Pretend.

 

Weihnachtsbaum in Turin

And suddenly it’s winter again,

The year 2021 has come to an end,

Maybe, I can close my eyes and pretend, 

Pretend, that its still twenty-ten.

 

Pretend, that im not nineteen years old, 

Pretend, that im playing soccer with my mates and not struggling with a cold,

That I caught way too fast. 

Pretend, that I did not spend most of 2021 holed up in my room alone,

With a laptop and a bag of chips, 

Wondering how I gained the new weight on my hips.

 

Maybe, I should jot down some resolutions for 2022, 

Because we all know “new year new me.” 

Yes, that’s what im gonna do!

And let’s pretend, that I stick to those resolutions and I won’t slack,

Let’s pretend, that I have the time to do self-care, go to the gym and stay on track, 

Let’s pretend, that I will do all that, 

Because I know I won’t. 

 

So why don’t I go somewhere nice, 

Somewhere, where I don’t have to pretend. 

Pretend, that another year has passed without me being able to take it fully in,

Because I can’t even begin to explain how scary a new year is when you’re grown up. 

 

How scary the prospect of this fresh, new, untouched and untainted piece of precious time is.

Italy seems like a good place to forget and forgive. 

Forget all the mishaps of 2021 and all the things I regret,

Forgive myself for all the mistakes I made and the people I have upset.

Italy, where I know nobody and nobody knows me. Where I pretend to not pretend. 

 

So happy 2022,

From me to you!